Friday, July 15, 2005

Lamb Chop still mute about life without Shari Lewis.

Beloved kids show puppet and sidekick of the late Shari Lewis is still keeping her vow of silence that began the day Shari Lewis died 7 years ago. Intrigued, I began to investigate why.
I tracked down Lamb Chop in a prop closet in KCET studios, the L.A. PBS affiliate. It was a far cry from the lavish satin chest Lamb enjoyed while living with Mrs. Lewis. I asked her what life has been like for the last seven years, but Lamb just lay there staring at the ground with those sad, black, button eyes.
I tried everything, including a one sided duet of "This is the song that never ends", to get Ms. Chop to speak, but all my efforts fell flat.
I thanked Lamb Chop and returned her to her Xerox paper box. I then went to station president Al Jerome's office to seek answers on Lamb Chop's vow of silence and request better dwellings for the famous sock. This is my short interview with Al Jerome.

BB: Mr Jerome, what do you make of Lamb Chop's(LC) silence.

AJ: Well it's quite simple. Mrs. Lewis was LC. Her voice was LC's voice.

BB: Yes they were soulmate's weren't they? An inseperable duo those two were.

AJ: No I don't think you understand. LC is a puppet. Mrs Lewis put her hand up LC's backside, moved LC's mouth and talked for LC. LC is a Puppet.

BB: Sir I understand Shari had much control over LC, but to accuse her of anal molestation is simply absurd. I can't believe these allegations and you should be ashamed of yourself sir.

AJ: You are an idiot. Will you please leave now?

After a few choice words with this despicable man, I was escorted from the building. I now have suspicion that LC is being held against her will. I will investigate this matter further and get back to you all.


At 7:58 PM, Anonymous Kat said...

This story brought a tear to my eye Burt, but I have one question. How can you stand getting up in the morning knowing that you left that precious little lamb to suffocate in a xerox box?

At 8:25 PM, Blogger Burt Beanley said...

I am planning a rescue mission at this very moment.


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