Monday, August 29, 2005

Calvin Klein Hired by KKK to Liven Up Their Drab, Outdated Uniforms.

(initial ckkk design for new Klan outfit)

As the Klan gets ready for its annual conference, National Director Thomas Robb announced the hiring of Calvin Klein to design a new uniform for the KKK. The new line of Klan garb will be called ckkk. The ckkk line will be an updated uniform that is aimed at attracting young, white, suburban kids. Klein said with that goal in mind, he has drawn his inspiration from hip-hop videos and violent PS2 games. Baggy throwback sports jerseys are an initial angle. Klein has also thought of mixing Birkenstocks and cargo shorts into the mix to reach a wider audience.
When asked why he chose a Jewish designer Mr. Robb had this to say. "That boy aint no Jew? Klein? I thought that was one of those Hitler Nazi names. I think you got him mistaken, sir. If that boy's a Jew then at least when the revolution comes, we may spare him; because these low rise cargo shorts make my ass look fabulous. And it's so much more comfortable to spread racism in the poly-cotton blend. That thick cotton robe is almost unbearably hot when you get close to a burning cross."
"I mean they are going to hate anyway," explained Klein when asked why he took the job, "At least let them be ignorant a**holes with style....This way, when I see them on the news I don't have to hate them and their fashion sense. I felt like together it was too much hate on my part."


At 5:10 PM, Anonymous Kat said...

Donovan called. He's not happy that "white power" is written on the back of an Eagles jersey. Calvin's a fan? Who knew?


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