(Get me the Eff Outta Here!)
Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have been holed up in a compound in Africa for the past weeks awaiting the arrival of their first child together. While most of the couple's family are ecstatic, not all are sharing the bliss.
Baby Zahara, Jolie's adoptive daughter, who is from Africa, is quite upset at being back in the motherland.
"What the F**k! This bit*h is crazy. Have you seen my house? We got top of the line everything; weight room, sauna, three pools, 72-inch Plasma, a personal chef that makes great baby food.. not that Gerber mush. So....What the hell is she doing in Africa?!? What the sh*t, I didn't sign up for this crap, " vented Zahara in an exclusive interview translated through expert baby interpreter Phil Seymour.
"If she wanted me to walk around with flies all up in my eyes and sh*t, why'd she even adopt me. I had a nice middle-class family wanting to adopt me. I thought, hell Angelina Jolie.. I'm going with her, to hell with the Joneses, I movin on up like George and Weezy. Now I am starting to think I should have slummed it in that three bedroom colonial in Long Island; That's better than traveling to all these places where I gotta wear my baby Louis Vuitton bullet-proof vest, ducking land mines with Maddox and them," added Zahara.